JOURNEYS Mennonite Stories of Faith and Survival in Stalins Russia, John B. Toews, 1998

e. This was also the time when people were called out for one reason or another. I waited. I was well practiced in waiting. How often I had waited in vain. Surely God would not allow that to happen. It was getting dark .... There was one last possibility. Three guards usually came in the evening for a careful prisoner count and to check the security of the prison bars. Only a deathly silence prevailed, no word, no movement - only the stench of a prison cell overcrowded with unhappy, de¬ spairing human beings. I spent a sleepless night and heard my name being called hundreds of times. Every movement of the guards in the corridor penetrated my ear, but there was no call to freedom. Not far away in [Pyatigorsk] my wife also tossed and turned, she too was the unhappiest woman in her lodging. She too could not sleep. The dawn came gradually. A new day began, but my heart was heavy and deeply burdened. 154 JOURNEYS 5 For many years we celebrated May 19,1930, as a day of remem¬ brance and thanksgiving in my family. It was the day I was released after six months of imprisonment.... The day before I saw my wife standing in line from a third-storey window .... I signalled that she should wait no longer and by stretching my hand northward indi¬ cated where I thought my pathway led. She understood .... I went to my cell, lay down and fell asleep. I don't know how long I slept before I heard my name called. Automatically I answered. Immedi¬ ately the great iron door opened and a soldier came in and in a pleas¬ ant tone of voice said, “Come, you are free to go.” I felt a bit like a soul going into a paradise after much suffering and sorrow. I said a brief and emotional goodbye to the brethren. All except Mr. Boldt were sentenced to five years. After their term ex¬ pired they briefly returned home only to be re-arrested and vanish forever in 1937. I distributed my sack of dried food to the other prisoners and the guards. The prison office checked my papers and certified my iden¬ tity .... I walked through several small doors and finally reached the main gate_I was free, completely free - no more locked doors and no more guards. It was almost too much but there was more - before me stood dear Anna and in seconds we were in each others’ arms. Such a reunion has to be experienced to be believed. We quickly left the prison with its bars and high walls and watchtowers. Ten meters away ... I stopped and took off my hat — my spiritual brothers together with many others were still suffering agony of soul and spirit — and I saw them clearly in the window waving their goodbyes .... Though we left Pyatigorsk by day we only arrived home the next day, May 20. We entered our parents’ home through the backyard. I felt I had brought shame to our family since no one had ever been imprisoned. Our parents were overjoyed .... After we ate together we went to our home. I felt awkward and shy yet that evening many guests a