JOURNEYS Mennonite Stories of Faith and Survival in Stalins Russia, John B. Toews, 1998

go home.” “You can’t despair like that, Anna,” he replied. “Trust in God. It is written, Look to yourselves that you may not lose what you have worked for, but may win a full reward’ (2 John 8). Anna, you will get home eventually.” “Father,” I said, “I’m so afraid that my loved ones at home will starve.” “No,” he said, “no one will die, no one will starve; and you will get home.” Then he vanished. When I awoke I felt so happy. I decided 40 JOURNEYS to make another appeal to the authorities to send me home. I went to the camp official who looked at me and sighed saying, “Kroeker, what shall I do with you? You’re not forty-five yet!” “Look,” I said, “I’ve been freed from prison; I’ve been freed from the Work Army. Now my family’s provider is gone, and I have my sister’s children to look after.” Suddenly, he took out a piece of paper, turned it over and wrote something on it. “Where do you want to go ?” he asked. “To Kazakhstan”, I replied. He nodded his head. “Is it possible that I am free and can leave?” I asked. He handed me a paper and said, “Here take this and go to room nine and they will prepare the necessary papers. You are free to go home!” All the preparations were made. I could hardly believe that I was going home. An added bonus was that the sister in Christ who had supplied me with the extra food, was also freed .... At first we travelled together on the same ship for nine days, then we separated because she was travelling to a different region. Now I was alone. My Russian was very poor. After a few days the train left for Novosibirsk. “Is that where the train is going?” I asked. I could not understand the answer. Exhausted after wait¬ ing for three days I fell asleep in the train. I noticed some commo¬ tion at night, but took little notice. I awoke the next morning and washed myself. “Where are you going?” a woman asked me, “You have so much baggage.” “I want to go to Novosibirsk,” I answered. “You’re on the wrong train,” she answered. “This one is going to Baikal.” I was so shocked that I stared at the window and cried. The conductor came by to check our tickets. I handed them over and continued to cry. The woman explained what had happened to me. He was very gracious. “I won’t fine you,” he said, “but you have to get off at the next station and buy a ticket.” He wrote down the name of the station. I got off with my two bundles slung on my shoulders and a suitcase in each hand. It was a heavy load. I asked where the tickets could be purchased and was shown the building, which was rather far away. What to do with all my baggage? I simply prayed: “Lord you know how heavy it is and how important it is to take this home. Send your guardian angel REMINISCENCES 41 to watch over this baggage until I return.” When I returned with my tickets everything was still there. The train came towards evening and I climbed aboard. When we came to the transfer statio