JOURNEYS Mennonite Stories of Faith and Survival in Stalins Russia, John B. Toews, 1998

man brigade sawing wood. Because the others were not fulfilling their norms we often lacked work. As a result the supervisor deposed me after three weeks .... I was then given the task of statistically determining the amount of wood be¬ ing pulled out of the river. Each day I reported to him. I was a good worker but my boss refused to give me back my previous job .... I didn't mind my work, especially since there was no work norm to fulfill and I received my regular meals .... I was fortunate enough to supervise a German brigade which easily fulfilled the work norm .... My boss suspected I was falsifying figures and so asked the supervisor to check my work. Our figures proved identical. In the process he nevertheless dis¬ covered several controllers who falsified their figures. They were immediately demoted. I again had hope, at least for the moment. As humans we really don’t know where our pathway will lead. Once during the night shift I was immersed in my numbers when a group of supervisors walked through our department. The last one, who knew me, stopped and asked what 1 was doing here. Why wasn’t I working in the horse transport? I reminded him 216 JOURNEYS that I was a German and no longer trusted by the government. He in turn asserted that those laws no longer applied, that each person should be assigned according to his speciality .... He insisted I write a brief resume .... I did so. When he returned he observed that he counted on me, hoped that I knew the horse business well and would not embarrass him before the camp ad¬ ministration .... He also reminded me that I was a German and that currently we were at war with Germany .... I knew it would be difficult to revive the horse park after such a long interval. It turned out to be easier than I imagined, thanks in no small part to the support of the administration. I was more or less free to do what I wished and no one interfered .... In spite of all my experience I did not last long. Looking back Im still not sure why. Perhaps I was inwardly exhausted . . . but there were possibly other reasons. I had no assistant, was extremely restricted in my freedom of movement, and lost nine horses (due to various circumstances) during my first two months on the job .... My boss staunchly continued to support me as head of the horse park, but really didn't help me solve my ongoing problems. I was entirely on my own when it came to hay, transport, har¬ nesses, harness oil and many other things .... Finally I was fired from my position, subjected to a ten-day barrack arrest and placed under heavy guard .... Now as a German and as a dangerous criminal I was subjected to a severe regime loading boards and beams onto railway cars .... Now began a long chain of events and circumstances which, thanks to God's mercy and grace, remained bearable. On the first day on the job a heavy beam fell on my foot . . . crushing it but breaking no bones . . . th