JOURNEYS Mennonite Stories of Faith and Survival in Stalins Russia, John B. Toews, 1998

a castoff piece of garbage, like a cancer in a socialist society we fled hearth and home and were of no use to anyone. What did the future hold? I am no longer alone. I have a wife and children for whom I am responsible. Perhaps we should journey into the great unknown rather than seek refuge with Annas parents. . . . The train finally brought us to our destination. . . . Our par¬ ents the Rosenfelds immediately noticed our unhappiness — what with all our suitcases and unhappy faces. There was much to talk about and during the first several days we felt like guests. . . . Our father was very concerned about us — he too knew what it meant to be blacklisted. We spent some days in Kleefeld and also visited our relatives in the surrounding villages. Then I began to look for work. There was a wealthy sovkoz not far from Kleefeld. It dis¬ tributed its young livestock to the surrounding villages, of which Kleefeld was the closest. They used the large barns of the former wealthy farmers and paid a ruble per head for the care of the live¬ stock. I too undertook to feed thirty to forty head of cattle. The sovkoz provided the feed. ... I had found work and a good source of bread [for my family]. We moved into the summer room [of our parent s house] where we had our own table, dishes and beds. We were starting over and felt confident. Not long after Anna's brother Bernhard brought us a few more things essential to our comfort. He also informed us that we should not try to go home [to Nikolaifeld].... They had come to arrest me that night but found I had escaped. . . . Bernhard was unable to obtain the documents I really needed and the ones designating me as a disenfranchised person were quite useless. In Kleefeld I was generally known as Rosenfelds son-in- MEMOIRS OF ARON WARKENTIN 159 law. No one seemed concerned about me and I was left in peace. Towards the end of winter Anna went to Suvorovka to negoti¬ ate with a certain citizen (a Martens?) who found himself in the same predicament there as we did here. . . . Anna not only re¬ turned with our two girls, but had done good business while there. She sold our cow [in Suvorovka] for a good price and we were able to buy a cow in Kleefeld. . . . We bought our wheat some thirty kilometers away, one sack at a time lest we be branded as specula¬ tors and imprisoned. ... I was very happy for we were together as a family and possessed everything we really needed. We were rich and for one brief moment we belonged to the privileged people. Here in Kleefeld I was ignored since I was not considered a full- fledged citizen. Spring arrived. The sovkoz owners came for their cattle. My efforts with the young stock was lauded, but my contract was not renewed. I was unemployed. What now? The large kolkoz in Kleefeld had no work for me and I possessed no documents per¬ mitting me to join the kolkoz . I was forced to apply to the sovkoz administration some six kilometer